Power Relationships: 26 Irrefutable Laws for Building Extraordinary Relationships By Andrew Sobel and Jerold Panas


I hope that you’re enjoying reading the book Power Relationships. What are your top 5 irrefutable laws for building extraordinary relationships?  These are mine:

#9. Walk in the other person’s shoes.

Human beings in general are very self-serving, however building strong relationships is based on one’s ability to show and share empathy by thinking about the pressures the other person is under and imagining what it is that they must be feeling.

“Walk a mile in my shoes/before you abuse, criticize and accuse/walk a mile in my shoes” - Joe South.

#11. Give trust to get trust.

Trust is a two-way street, people become what we believe and expect of them. Distrust makes it impossible to build a healthy relationship both personally and professionally.

In Power Relationships the authors share five prudent ways that you can build trust in your relationships.

  1. Assess the risk of trusting

  2. Understand the essence of trust

  3. Assume positive intentions in the other person

  4. Trust by verifying

  5. Build trust through behavior, not words

#13. Treat a prospect like a client and there’s a good chance they’ll become one.

This law took me a long time to learn. The typical business mindset is to spend as little time as possible on prospecting and instead nurture your business relationships. On the contrary, treating your prospects as your most valuable clients is actually the fastest way to double your business.  

#18. Make them curious.

What is curiosity? It is the desire to know. Evoking the other person’s curiosity in business can be very useful. Here are a couple of rules that I find to be beneficial:

  1. Tell people what they need to know, not everything you know.

  2. Hint at things, don’t lecture.  

  3. Tell people what you do and your results, not every detail about how you do it.  

#22. Become part of your clients’ growth and profits and they’ll never get enough of you.  

I believe the closer you are to the dollar, in favor for your client, the more valuable you will become. Focus your client proposals on what your client needs to have done. Frame your work in terms of how it will help your client grow, innovate, and be more profitable. Define yourself as being “in the business of improving your client’s condition”, not just doing a project or fulfilling an order.